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Developing resilience in children of divorce

On Behalf of | Nov 8, 2018 | Divorce |

In order for children in Connecticut to better deal with the stresses of divorce, they need to come to the table armed with a skill set they have developed over time. Parents should work with their children from a young age to instill in them certain traits that will assist them in dealing not only with the stresses of divorce but also other challenges they will face throughout their lives. A well-known pediatrician and author compiled a list of seven “C” skills that he says are imperative to promoting resilience in children.

“Competence” and “confidence” in handling stressful situations are the first two characteristics that promote resilience in children. The third, “connection,” refers to the idea that children who have strong family and community ties have a stronger foundation with more of a sense of belonging and accountability. This will help the child make better, more responsible decisions in his or her life.

A child who has developed “character” will have a strong sense of self. He or she will know right and wrong and will be committed to doing right. Through “contribution” a child will learn that he or she has the ability to be a positive asset to the world which will improve his or her self-confidence.

When a child has learned the skill of “control” he or she will be able to reduce life’s stresses by making better decisions. Once children learn that they have the ability to make choices that will impact the direction their lives take, they have to learn to make wise decisions. Sometimes children don’t have the ability to change their circumstances, and in these situations “coping” skills will help them deal with the uncontrollable situations in life.

Children need a strong foundation of skills with which they can face the changes and challenges of life. Although divorce can be a difficult time, with these seven C’s of resilience, a child will be able to get through it more easily and experience a better overall outcome. If a parent needs some assistance in learning how to best help children through the divorce process, his or her attorney can give provide advice on therapists and counselors in Connecticut who can guide the family through the process and produce a more positive experience for the whole family.