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How do I know if my spouse cheated without a confession?

On Behalf of | Feb 6, 2021 | Family Law |

If your spouse’s behavior toward you has changed, a reasonable question is whether they began a relationship with someone else. Infidelity generally does not impact how divorce proceedings unfold in Connecticut, but you might want to know for your personal healing.

Perhaps, one of the best ways to discover the truth is to ask. However, you might not feel willing to confront him or her. Maybe you already asked and he or she denied this, but you feel the answer does not reflect the truth.

Social scientists published by Science Daily have identified some predictors for divorce and infidelity. These might provide some guidance on specifics to discuss with your ex or your therapist as you work through the divorce.


Researchers found that when married people quickly disengaged attention from other attractive persons, this behavior correlated with a low risk of infidelity. To test this, social scientists presented married individuals with pictures of attractive people and tested their responses and response times.


Another factor social scientists determined could affect infidelity was whether the person downplayed the attractiveness of the person pictured. These persons reacted to the picture by insisting the person did not look that attractive and evaluated romantic alternatives in a negative light. People who did this proved less likely to cheat.

Dating history

A curious predictor of fidelity in a marriage was the prevalence of short-term relationships prior to marriage. Women with a history of many short-term relationships exhibited a lower likelihood of infidelity, but men with similar histories proved more likely to cheat.

While these findings provide a fascinating insight into human behavior, they cannot predict with certainty whether your spouse cheated. In some cases, you might need to move on without ever knowing for sure whether he or she cheated during the marriage.