People experience a broad range of emotions when dealing with an upcoming divorce. One of the most common is embarrassment or shame. It can be humiliating to think about needing to tell your family, friends and coworkers about the fact that your marriage is over. It can make you feel like a failure, even if you did everything in your power to keep your marriage functional and healthy.
Concerns about embarrassment and how public a divorce can be may even keep some people from seeking a divorce. If you worry about your privacy, it may be time to consider mediation. Mediation is a form of collaborative law that offers a host of benefits to divorcing couples. Not only can mediation result in a less contentious divorce, but it can also help keep your divorce more private.
Mediation is private, but divorce court is public
A typical mediation session involves you and your spouse sitting down with your individual attorneys and a neutral mediator. You will then work to find reasonable compromises regarding the outstanding issues from your marriage, such as splitting up your debts and assets. Unless there is a warrant for your mediation records, what you say in mediation typically remains confidential and private.
That is very different from divorce court, which is effectively public. Anything that you say in court gets taken down by the stenographer, and it will later become public record. Anyone from professional rivals to your children can eventually request copies of your court records. The testimony couples give in divorce court often has to do with personal issues, ranging from addiction to infidelity. It is understandable to not want that information made public.
Mediation allows you to discuss those issues and how they impact your marriage and divorce without making those issues public record. That additional privacy can be invaluable for high-profile individuals, such as politicians and successful professionals.
Mediation is also faster and cheaper than a contested divorce
Working through your marital issues in mediation requires the ability to compromise with your ex. However, the benefits far outweigh the effort it takes. For example, when mediation is successful, you can file an uncontested divorce. In that situation, a Connecticut judge only needs to approve the terms of your custody arrangements and property division as compliant with Connecticut law.
Unlike a contested divorce, an uncontested divorce is relatively quick and requires much less expense. You will not have to pay for as much of the court's time or your attorney's time. You also won't have to waste months worrying about the outcome. Instead, you can file, attend your court dates and prepare to move on with your life after the divorce.